The dillema corner

[CelticKitten]

I finally know a date for my divorce. It still hurts me. To be honest: it hurts me more realizing I do not care a bit about my husband anymore, than to know I am losing him.
I sometimes do feel weird, since I am not used to hating people, but I do hate my husband. I like him out of my life.

In the main time I realize I do miss my friend, although he has got another. I can live with that now, but I do feel sad for the fact that he broke up the friendship, due to some things that happened behind my back and that really hurt me.

Missing my friend hurts me more than getting a divorce. I know this might sound stupid, but it just is this way. I do miss friends, since I lost many lately.

In the main time I still have not found a new partner and kind of gave up looking. Seems like I lost faith in relationships. In the beginning I hoped I might have found somebody better soon, but now I think I just got used to being single. I hate it, but if Mr Right does not show up, I'll just accept it.

So far I have read a poetry bundle on how I felt lately. I kind of mixed some people and events up in it, to deal with the pain.

I am planning on publishing it on Lulu. Not sure if it will sell, but getting spreading my feelings in a creative way helps me to deal with them.